There’s a game, and you’re always playing it–whether you realize it or not.
by BY BILL MURPHY JR., WWW.BILLMURPHYJR.COM@BILLMURPHYJR
For Inc.
Illustration: Getty Images
This is a story about emotional intelligence, building resilience, and (oddly) high school humor.
When I was a teenager, some friends and I used to frequent a Chinese restaurant. A girl who was sort of the center of the group and the life of the party (let’s call her Jessica) introduced us to a PG-13 joke that you probably know.
It went like this. At the end of every meal, we’d get fortune cookies, and we’d read the fortunes out loud. Then, we’d pause and look at Jessica.
- For example, my fortune might read: “Focus, determination, and hard work will always pay off …”
- And Jessica would add, “In bed!”
It made almost every fortune funny:
- “Challenge and adventure awaits!” (“In bed.”)
- “Your road to success may be bumpy, but it will also be glorious.” (“In bed.”)
- “Everyone knows fear, but not everyone learns bravery.” (“In bed.”)
Here we are, decades later, and I cannot imagine of a fortune cookie without automatically adding the words “in bed.”
The fortune cookie rule is about training yourself to reclassify almost any criticism or rejection so that it encourages you rather than discourages you — or at least falls into the realm of the irrelevant — by learning to append simple, silent phrases to it in your mind.