To avoid getting sucked in, ask yourself this important question.
by MINDA ZETLIN, AUTHOR OF ‘CAREER SELF-CARE: FIND YOUR HAPPINESS, SUCCESS, AND FULFILLMENT AT WORK’@MINDAZETLIN for INC.
Photo: Anna Sorokin at New York State Supreme Court in New York. Photo: Getty Images
For four years, a woman who called herself Anna Delvey and claimed to be a German heiress lived in luxury hotels in New York City, dining in some of the city’s best restaurants, partying in its best night clubs, and bilking both friends and institutions for a total of $275,000. She announced that she planned to open a combined artist’s center/exclusive club in a historic Park Avenue building, and came close to securing a $22 million loan for that project. She was eventually arrested after ducking one hotel bill too many, leaving behind an impressive trail of unpaid loans and fantastical excuses. Her story is a cautionary tale for everyone about who we choose to believe–and why–both in business and in life.
Delvey’s story raises some tantalizing questions. How did a 23-year-old manage to create this fictional alternate reality and make it seem so real? Where did she get the $100 bills that she famously tipped with in luxury hotels? And especially, how did she keep the charade going, constantly borrowing from new sources to pay off old ones, for four years?
Some would ask the question that my husband posed as I sat binge-watching the Netflix series: “Why does anybody believe someone like that?” That’s the only one of these questions I can readily answer, not because I’ve ever met Anna Delvey or traveled in the stratosphere of wealthy New York society, but from my own experience. Years ago, I got sucked in by someone who also claimed to come from a wealthy family–Peruvian, in his case. And though I didn’t lend him large sums of money or hand over my credit card, I did something equally disastrous–I married him.